Imagine: you go to engineering school, because that’s what your parents desire – but it is not what you want. Working at cross-purposes to your own wishes, you find yourself unmotivated, and failing. You will struggle to concentrate and discipline yourself, but it will not work. Your soul will reject the tyranny of your will (how else could that be said?). Why are you complying? You may not want to disappoint your parents (although if you fail you will do exactly that). You may lack the courage for the conflict necessary to free yourself. You may not want to sacrifice your childish beliefs in parental omniscience, wishing devoutly to continue believing that there is someone who knows better than you know yourself, and who also knows all about the world. You want to be shielded in this manner from the stark existential aloneness of individual Being and its attendant responsibility. This is all very common and understandable. But you suffer because you are truly not meant to be an engineer.

One day, you have had enough. You drop out. You disappoint your parents. You learn to live with that. You consult only yourself, even though that means you must rely on you own decisions. You take a philosophy degree. You accept the burden of your own mistakes. You become your own person. By rejecting your father’s vision, you develop your own. And then, as your parents age, you’ve become adult enough to be there for them, when they come to need you. They win, too. But both victories had to be purchased at the cost of the conflict engendered by your truth.

Jordan B Peterson, 12 Rules for Life

You can substitute “engineering” for any other familial or societal expectation that just doesn’t sit right with you, and this story works.

At a certain point, growing up necessitates making your own life choices and taking responsibility for whatever happens to those choices. It means we cannot fall back and blame society or family or whatever existing hierarchy for imposing a standard path or set of choices for us to follow.