I don’t like CNY weekends.

I would normally plan ahead and jet off somewhere in order to fully utilise these holidays, but I have to ration out my leave this year since the revenge travel bug made me firm up two big trips in the upcoming months already.

I don’t like CNY weekends because there really isn’t much to do if you aren’t within a typical family setup, with tons of cousins, relatives and what not. Gyms and cafes are closed, so well.. that removes most of the things I would enjoy doing.

I don’t like CNY weekends also because my partner has loads of family plans, so well, I can’t look there as well. So there’s a jarring contrast that’s further fuelled by social media – people are gathering and having festivities, whilst I’m gathering dust (heehee).

Then I wonder if its the failure of my social networks that I don’t have activities. But on more careful reflection, I think its more that I’m lazy – the equivalent of a social princess, expecting things to be planned for me and that I get invited to things (some of my friends would gleefully agree with this statement).

I need to call myself out, because sometimes I wallow and complain without realising I always had the keys to remedy the situation I am in. It’s not that I don’t have family visitations, but that I am half-hearted about going for them. And that half-heartedness means that unless people intentionally reach out or plan things, I’m not going to proactively go for these visitations.

But maybe the half-heartedness comes from the dread of hearing the marriage or girlfriend questions. Maybe it comes from imagining the exhaustion from the somewhat farcical, superficial, once-in-a-year engagements.

The crux of the question is.. who do you see as your family and extended family? Have you made an effort to let them into your life, as well as be a part of their lives across the year? If not flesh and blood family, then have you actually made an effort to reach out and plan things with close friends that are like family to you? To ask them about their plans and bravely ask to be included (of course with full awareness of potential rejection).

Stop being that social princess (not only for CNY period as well) and be intentional about reaching out and pursuing people that matter to you.